Barbie Biology

::Singing:: “I’m a Barbie girl in a Barbie worrrld, life in plastic, it’s fantastic!”
Except not.

As a little girl I owned many Barbie branded items, (who didn’t?) the multi-level “dream” house complete with pulley elevator, the battery-powered pink Jeep that I drove around the cul de sac collecting autumn leaves and rocks, naturally. I also owned shififtyfive multi-talented, career-driven Barbie dolls, who had drawers full of clothing for any and all occasions. I mean what if she wanted to roller skate in the park with her puppy and sister Skipper? A girl needs options!

However, being a kid I’m not sure I even realized how un-proportional the Barbie doll actually was compared to the human species because I was too busy using my imagination (yay, creativity!) and finding the matching minuscule plastic high heel in the air vent. Pesky things never stayed put.
Shoeless Barbies forever.

After I grew up and playtime was over I began to realize the trademark Barbie bod was no where near that of normal girls’ errr… humans’. Reality check: Barbie’s are the in-hand version of the digitally altered images we see on the glossy pages of magazines.
Refinery 29 put out an article with the most glorious graphics from Rehabs.com demonstrating the ridiculousness of the Barbie body, asking “Is the Barbie body possible?” The short answer: No. But read on for just how ridiculous.

Barbie Biology Image courtesy of Rehabs.com

Barbie Biology
Image courtesy of Rehabs.com

• Her neck is twice as long and 6 inches skinner than an average woman—Barbie wouldn’t be able to hold up her own head.
• Her bust line is 32” around, an average ladies 35”. Then the cup size would probably land Barbie on her face because she’d be so front heavy. Because science, namely gravity.
• Barbie’s waist, 16 inches. 16 INCHES, this is smaller than her head people! Having a waist that small would only fit half a liver and a few inches of intestine. Not to mention her waist-hip ration is alllll outta whack.
• Wrists, why they’re as big around as a pencil (I’m exaggerating here). No heavy lifting for Barbie. Snap, crackle, pop. Ouch.
• Barbie’s legs are 50% longer than her arms and only 16 inches around. Normal.
• Her feet, permanently arched (um, foot cramps much?) waiting for that disappeared-never-to-return-again high heel comes in a whopping child size 3 dangling off ankles that measure 6 inches long. Barbie would have to be like the majority of our mammal friends and walk on all fours. Because again, science of the anatomy, biology and physics genre.
What I’m trying to say is don’t be Barbie. What I’m trying to say is Barbie is not real. But you knew that already, just testing you!

What I’m really saying is if you model your ideal perception of beauty and health to be Barbie and are striving to become her, stop it! You can’t be her because, like I said earlier, science. Deal with it. All you can be is You! The happy, healthy, beautiful You!!!

4 thoughts on “Barbie Biology

  1. Leanne

    It’s so funny you posted this today! We were having a conversation at work about our favorite superheros as kids and I was stumped. I never connected with superheros…I played with Barbies! Which, I loved by the way, but what did Barbie do to save people like Superman, Spiderman, or hey, Wonder Woman? Girls should love their bodies because of what they can do and feel, not just what they look like. Love your post, as usual!

    Reply
  2. Anteah J

    Great post. We discussed Barbie in one of our GOTR lessons about peer pressure. I was shocked to hear that many girls wanted a barbie body. Of course, any girl on my team is taught to appreciate their amazing and unique talents, image, and most importantly, their intelligence. Barbie can’t play the violin like (girl name). Barbie doesn’t have a beautiful singing voice like (girl name). Barbie doesn’t have great parents like (girl name). Barbie can’t make me laugh like (girl name). Barbie can’t even bring me flowers and give me hugs, just because like (girl name). And get this….Barbie doesn’t have a cool coach (me, yep, it’s true) who respects, values, and likes each girl on the team for who they are…not what they look like. The girls and parents understood the message and it was great to see that each girl reported this: What do you like most about yourself? My team reported, “I love being able to be myself and not being judged and compared to others!” “The coach reminds us how unique and appreciated we are which is seen in her smile and praises.” All this to say, there is nothing unique about Barbie. And based on your break down of her body image, something is clearly wrong with her. So, I will continue to love the amazing me and accept all the diversity that comes along with me.

    Reply
  3. scarletwonderland

    I absolutely LOVE this post! I cannot believe those measurements, it’s so crazy when you see them like that, it’s hard to believe I didn’t notice how out of proportion she was! (PS. LOVE your blog) x

    Reply

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